Nothing Left to Say
by Colonel Karl L Schubaltz
Summary: **Rating for Yaoi Lemon** Irvine/Van. My first attempt at a non-Karl fic
1. Under the Moonlight

  
  
  


**Nothing Left to Say**  
Written by _Colonel Karl L Schubaltz_

  
  
  


**Dedications and Dankes**

I like to thank RaVen0us formerly called Ori Oscuro for the first ever Karl/Thomas lemon fic I seen on ff.net. I like to thank Naomi Hunter, Dread Wulf, December and Maelgwen for making my position in the Zoids fanficion writing biz as cushy as possible Alica Tylon A.K.A The Almighty Dana for getting me into the wonderful world of Zoids Andy Deane, Gopal Metro, Tony Lechmansky, and James Warnock, the members of the gothic rock band, Bella Morte for inspiration unnumbered The Creators of the anime series and for the model kits. *bows and grovels* **I'M NOT WORTHY! I'M NOT WORTHY!! I'M SCUM! I SUCK!!** The Goddess, yes, I'm a Born-Again Pagan. My muses, Cacophony, Melpomene and Eratos. And, Red Rum... reviews do boost my self-esteem, fuels my right as an artist. I write fanfics to silence the muses in my head, they need the Prozac... not me =P   
  
_This is my first Irvine x Van ficcie... No Karl =pppppp_   
  
  
_He stands in the chill of night  
With snow swirling down  
Memories lurking in his eyes  
Blood is on his hands  
She still lives inside of him  
She still holds his eyes in thrall  
She still softly sings to him  
And she still owns his soul  
  
And he will live forever more  
The walls of his world crashing down  
Alone in the dark  
The walls of his world crashing down  
Shadows in his mind  
The walls of his world crashing down  
Sanity has gone  
  
Tears of blood roll down his cheeks  
As she cried his name  
Trapped he stood and watched her fall  
Screaming in the rain  
He still hears her crying there  
Sees her pictures on the wall  
He still sees her lying there  
And he still hears her call_   
  
  
  
  
The amber liquid in the shot glass full of ice thinned out with time's passing. He ran his fingers through his rough, brown hair, greasy from days of not being in a hot shower. His eyepatch set gently off to one side, giving his eye some air to breathe and cool off. He stared aimlessly into the scotch, thinking of someone who he thought at one point as a potential lover and business partner. But he smeared those emotions in the ground when he thought of her. Taking the drink into his hand, the mercenary drowned the remaining shred of true love he felt for him with scotch. Slamming the glass on the counter, the handsome mercenary looked up at the bartender. "Another scotch." "Slow down, pal. No need to get plastered..." The bartender's collar was grabbed, the mercenary stared coldly into the older man's eyes. "I just found out that the man I once loved got married to a blonde hussy in a pink dress. Fill the motherfucking glass up or you'll be needing a medic really fast..." "Y-y-yes, sir... right away, sir." The bartender took the man's glass frantically. The mercenary sighed sadly and waited for his drink to arrive. A man next to him muttered something, causing him alarm. "Faggot." The man snarled. "What did you say?" "I called you a faggot. Got a problem with that, queer?" The man turned around, then was shot in the gut. He fell down dead, the mercenary put a pistol on the counter. "...no." He answered coldly, then sipped his newly-arrived drink. Continuing to listen to the churning of the jukebox, the brunette mercenary went into a dream-haze.   
*********   
The stars shined overhead, Thomas, Moonbay and Fiona were asleep in the Gustav. In the safey of the forest, in a small lagoon, two bodies entwined in passion. Their clothes were frantically discarded aside, their weapons further apart, the moonlight were their only light. His tongue tickled his lover's tan nipple, his fingers brushing through his brown hair passionately. His teeth playfully nipped at the younger man's left nipple, causing a startled reaction. "I-irvine!" He yipped but the taller man's mouth cupped over his own, his tongue forcing its' way in. "Shut up, you wanna get us caught?" Irvine joked dryly, his arms encompassing around Van's muscular body. "Fiona wouldn't be too happy if she saw us fucking in the water." "Then stop biting me!" Van exclaimed, his boyish face twisted in an angry scowl, but it was a half-hearted scowl. It was more playful than angry. "How else do you want me to make you ragingly horny? Do the teapot dance wearing a bra and panties?" Irvine joked, his arms still around Van's waist. "Now that you think of it, that does sound a little amus--!!" "Dipshit." Irvine playfully and teasingly slugged Van, causing the Republican GF pilot to laugh into the night. They were lying down in the water now, the water rushing over their naked bodies. Irvine leaned down to kiss Van on the lips, their tongues wrestled for control. "You're getting hard, Flyheight. Are you getting horny for me?" Irvine pinched Van's shaft, smirking in his cool-boy style. "Stop it, that actually hurt." "Hurt so bad that it felt so good?" "Well, I.... I guess... but..." Irvine got back on top of Van, the brunette pushed him further down until it was Van's head and knees sticking out of the water. "Then let me make it worth your while." "I-irvine!!" Van felt Irvine's hard member entering his tender opening, he let out a loud gasp of excruciating pain. But that soon melted into feelings of pure ecstasy as Irvine starting to push and thrust in and out. Digging his fingers into the clay-like lagoon bottom, Van tipped his head all the way back, moaning and gasping. His black hair let out of the normal scruffy ponytail, then looked up at Irvine. Irvine was snarling and grinning at the same time, his face and muscular arms covered with a fine layer of sweat. The mercenary thrusted in and out harshly, but to both of their surprise, it felt so good. "Irete!! Irete kure!!!" Van cried out, his fingers grasped Irvine's dark hair. (Translation: Shove it in!! Please shover it in!!) "You're so cute when you talk dirty." Irvine grinned, then nibbled passionately and erotically on Van's jawline. "I-irvine!!!" The 18-year-old shouted to his male lover, his fingers clawed into Irvine's back. "Itchau!! Itchau!!!" (Translation: I'm coming! I'm coming!!) The water soon became sudsy with the climax of esctasy, Irvine and Van sat up from the water and laughed as they breathed deeply. "Ii ko da." Irvine jested, grinning like the fox that he was. (translation: Good boy) "Irvine... y-you... you bastard!" Van slugged his arm, sitting back against the water. "We could have awaken the others!" "Ha ha ha ha!" Irvine laughed, then reached for the satchel by the shore. "Fat chance, you know Schubaltz's brat brother and Moonbay sleep like the dead." "True... but Fiona or Zeke could have been paying attention...!!" "They were in for one helluva show." Irvine lit a cigarette and started smoking, lounging against the log in the water. He stared off into the moonlight, in deep thought. Van snuggled up to the taller man and smiled. "You did make me feel so good..." "I knew I would, kid. You know I love you." Irvine stroked Van's soaking black hair, smiling thoughtfully. The night was blissfully silent...   
************ "Irvine! There you are!" Moonbay rushed in with a bag of supplies. "Come on! We're going to be late for Van and Fiona's wedding!" "Go on without me, Moonbay." Irvine turned in her general direction, his expressionless eyes piercing into hers. "Why? You promised you'd be there for Van!!" "Because, Moonbay..." Irvine put his eyepatch on and walked for the door, slinging his bag over his shoulders. As he passed her, he spoke in a low voice. "...there's nothing left to say." "I-irvine?" Moonbay watched her former bodyguard walk off into the night...   
  
  


**-End**


	2. Resentment of Betrayal

  
  
  


**Nothing Left to Say**  
_Part Two: Resentment of Betrayal_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
It was a quiet evening under the stars, Irvine stared up at the moonless night. The night time was always a sorrowful comfort to one such as himself. Irvine looked the night time, it brought him the creature comforts nothing else ever could-- except what he felt when he was with Van. He growled when he thought of the 18-year-old GF pilot, pulling the cigarette pack from his pants. "The fucktard is happy now. Not much else to do there." It's the hurt that heals, another scar on Irvine's already scarred heart. He lit the cigarette and leaned backward against the tree. Irvine's eyelid slowly began to close, but he reminded himself to stay awake. Under the dillusion that he'll blink and his already solitairy life would be gone, Irvine reminded himself bitterly that he needed to remain awake. The biting cold nipped at his tan, muscular body, causing his skin to goosebump. Sitting up from his makeshift bed and looked around, Irvine was sadly expecting a spectre from the past to visit him. However, like the rest of the nights in his life... it was cold and lonely. Before he finally let the sleep take him away, Irvine looked at the stars and took the last puff of his cigarette. "Van, if you're listening wherever you are... I hope you choke on your own bullshit."   
  
The Wind Colony was alive with the bussle of the upcoming wedding. The sun was shining overhead, the noonday shadows made everything look so pretty. Van Flyheight rushed down the street when the Gustav arrived with Moonbay behind the wheel. The native-American looking woman got out of the Gustav, smiling up a storm. "Hey, Moonbay. Glad you could make it." "Glad to join you during this happy occassion." "Where's Irvine?" "Oh." Moonbay was hesitant to speak out what had happened, she turned toward the horizon and frowned. "Irvine didn't want to come." "Why?" "Dunno. I saw him at a pub getting drunk and he just left... he said 'there was nothing more to say'." "..." Van let out a sigh of exasperation, then muttered softly. "I do love him." "What?" The brown-haired girl turned to face her GF pilot friend. Van looked up at her with a sad look on his face. "When Irvine and I were seeing each other, I had doubts that I loved Fiona as well. I didn't want to lose Fiona but... I guess.... I ended up hurting Irvine in the process." "You and Irvine were an item?" Moonbay asked, shocked and almost appalled. "B-but.... but you... I thought Irvine said..." "I need to find Irvine!" Van shouted without an explanation, then rushed passed her toward the Blade Liger. "Van!!" Fiona's voice stopped him from going any further, she rushed out of the cathedral, smiling and wearing the dress. "How do I look?" "Y-you look perfect." Van smiled, blushing a bit, but Fiona frowned, she was aware that Van was not happy. "Oh? You don't like the dress? I can get another one made." "No... you look lovely in it." "Then what's the matter? You look so upset..." Fiona put her hands on his shoulders, then yanked them away. "You... you don't love me anymore, do you, Van?" "Fiona, I'm going to be honest with you now. I'm homosexual, me and Irvine were dating each other for a while but I got scared... I wanted to make you happy but I... I ripped Irvine's heart out of his chest and stomped all over it. Irvine's not coming to the wedding because I got scared!" "Y-you... you lied to me??" Fiona found herself feeling her heart crushed in her chest by the man who would have been her husband. "Fiona! I got scared over my own sexual orientation! I wanted to make you happy!" "You lied to me the same way you lied to Irvine!" Fiona shouted, throwing her bouquet down and glaring into Van's eyes. She reeled her hand back and slapped him hard, Van twisted his head back after feeling the impact of the slap. "If you love him that much, go back to him. You backstabbers belong to each other." The zoidian walked off, in tears. Moonbay folded her arms and marched right up to the young man. She shook her head and let out a small sigh. "You really messed up this time, Van." "I know, Moonbay. And I'm sorry." "I'm not the one you're to be saying sorry to. It's Irvine. If you want to catch him, he'll be heading for the last transporter to Smuggler's Glen. You can catch him at Moonbeam Forest. He's usually there for a few days on end." "...thank-you, Moonbay." Van walked to the Blade Liger and jumped in, the orange canopy closed tightly, allowing him to run off. ".... Poor Fiona."   
  
The weather didn't exactly cooperate with Irvine's plans for going to Smuggler's Glen for refuge. Deep within his emotionless violet eyes, Irvine did feel the bitter resentment with being betrayed and heart-broken. The Lightning Saix was still being quarentined for transport by the smugglers of the area. He was going to the one place he felt was home to him. Irvine looked up at the rumbling thunder, he felt the lashing of the wind as it beat down on him and the workers. "Irvine! We need to cover everything up with a tarp!" "Hurry up!" Irvine shouted, looking back at the weather as it worstened. "This storm looks horrible!!" "Go back to the shelter! We'll work from there!" Irvine rushed back to the shelter, opening the door and forcing himself inside. He wiped the rain from his eyepatch and hair, the place was dry and cozy. The small town was only miles away from Smuggler's Glen, Irvine was thankful of getting this far before the storm hit. He lied down on the bed and watched the ceiling as the candlelight flickered with the passing wind. The whipping wind was masking a new visitor's approach.   
Irvine turned onto his side, closing his eyes and was soon to fall asleep when there was a pounding on the door. He unhooked the dagger at his belt, Irvine carefully approached the door and opened it. A smaller figure swung into the room with the wind, knocking the candle out and leaving them in perpetual darkness. Looking at the figure, the mercenary recognised the childlike face and red stripe of the man he swore he loved. "Van!? What the fuck!?" Irvine shouted in surprise, standing up with fists clenched. "I thought you were marrying Fiona, you sick, sadistic psychopath!" "I came here to look for you!" Van shouted, Zeke closed the door as he stomped in from the rain and the storm. "So you can drag me to your perfect little ceremony, act all happy, prim and proper while you and Fiona become husband and wife and twist the knife in my chest!? Forget it! Go fuck yourself, Flyheight!" "Me and Fiona are not getting married!" Van shouted, his fists clenched as well, his anger twinged with sorrow. "Why not!? Found someone new to hang onto!?" Irvine twisted away from Van, his teeth clenched, his anger rising as his eyes began to mist over. "No! I left her to find you.... I loved you, Irvine. I still love you!!!" Van was interupted when he was socked in the mouth by Irvine's iron fist. "I cursed the day you said those three words to me." Irvine snarled, a tear fell down his cheek, but he wiped it away and reached for a cigarette. Van wiped his chin with the back of his hand, but his collar was grabbed by a strong hand. With force, Irvine pulled him close to give him a wet, sloppy kiss. Van's eyes widened with shock, but a light blush tinted his cheeks and his eyelids closed softly. He gripped Irvine's dark grey shirt as the brunette mercenary pulled Van's body close to his. Zeke tilted his head to the side, confused. "Errrr?" Pushing Van away, Irvine gathered his gear and lit the cigarette with a match. Van stood up slowly to see what he was going to do next. The brunette walked for the door and touched it with his hand. "Irvine, please... I love you." "Your love is misplaced, Van..." Irvine replied with a sad, sad tone of voice. "....I cannot return the sentiment. Not anymore.... You tore my love for you in two, and that, Flyheight, I can never forgive you for. Go home to Wind Colony, forget about me. It'll be better for the both of us." "I-irvine!!!" Van rushed out of the shelter to see Irvine enter the transport. He ran for it as the large bird zoid took off for Smuggler's Glen. "IRVINE!!!!!"   
  
  


**-Continued-**


End file.
